The 9-point Oath of Neo-Proponents of Freedom of Expression

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  • Freedom of Expression3I, novice unnamed below, hereby solemnly swear, henceforth, that:
  • 1.       I will strongly abhor all so-called schools of journalism and the drivel they teach
  • 2.       I will wholly despise truth and report everything but those called ‘facts’
  • 3.       No structured administration – governments, associations, business enterprises, etc., escapes my scathing words, impish imagery and/or stilted wrath
  • 4.       I will fervently loathe all who talk sense, or preach moderation or talk or development, promising to call them all sorts of  names, thwart their efforts and misinterpret their intentions
  • 5.       I will only befriend he who pays me
  • 6.       I will devotedly use a comprehensive list of foreign and local contacts that fully support me in belittling all national objectives, state secrets, law and order and/or denigrate state organs such as the judiciary, the legislative and the executive
  • 7.       I will, invariably,  invent stories where there is a dearth of those that I can tailor to my stunted views
  • 8.       I will intentionally misuse and abrogate language, ethical standards, social etiquette  as they do not further my cause
  • 9.       Nothing remains sacrosanct, respect-worthy and beyond the reach of my pen, camera and cassette recorder regardless of cultural and moral considerations, and/or sensitivity

 

Sulman Abdurahim

Ashgabat, Turkmenistan

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